Does God Care about Our Pain?

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. (Matthew 5:4)

It is neither unusual nor inappropriate to ask questions of God during times of deep grief.  I spent time grieving when I lost my brother in 1973, and then my parents and grandmother in 2002.  And when I lost my legs in 2010-2011 I was surprised to find I went through another period of grieving.

Grief is an emotion common to the human experience, and we witness the process of grief throughout the biblical account.  Multiple Bible characters experienced deep loss and sadness, including Job, Naomi, Hannah, and David.  But whatever our pain, we need to remember three things: God understands our pain, He cares, and God can bring us through it; even making something beautiful out of it.

God relates to our pain because His own Son, Jesus, suffered and died on a cross.  Another particular example comes to mind in John 11:33-35 where we read that, “When Jesus therefore saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her, [also] weeping, He was deeply moved in spirit, and was troubled,  and said, "Where have you laid him?" They *said to Him, "Lord, come and see." Jesus wept.”

Of all people, Jesus obviously knew about Heaven.  He knew that Lazarus wasn't suffering.  But He also knew that it hurt to lose him.  Even though we know someone is no longer suffering, or something is for the best, God doesn't expect us to act as if nothing had happened, or say "Well, He is with Jesus, praise the Lord," and then just happily go on our way.

It is wonderful to keep an eternal perspective on things.  However, God has built grief into us as a normal emotion, and we need to allow ourselves to feel it and work through it.  God cares about our pain.  He knows everything about us, but He wants to hear from us.

We are reminded in Psalm 62:8 that we should, “Trust in Him at all times, O people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us.”

He wants us to pour out our hearts to Him.  He wants to hear our hurts.  He isn't a distant God who is unfriendly and cold.   But He is a loving God, a Shepherd, and a Father.  Those of you who are parents—think about how you feel for your children when they are grieving; whether it is over a friend who has moved, or even a much-loved pet who has died.

Consider how our Heavenly Father loves us even more than you love your children.  Imagine how much more He cares for us in our grief than that!  But ultimately, our perspective needs to be eternal, as well as for God's glory and purpose.  And we often find God has taught us valuable lessons from our pain.

In her book, “When God Weeps: Why Our Sufferings Matter to the Almighty” Joni Eareckson Tada writes, “By itself suffering does no good. But when we see it as the thing between God and us, it has meaning. Wedged in the crux—the cross—suffering becomes a transaction. The cross is a place of transaction. It is the place where power happens between God and us.”

I can honestly say that I have gained valuable insight through the pain I have faced.  I can now better understand others' pain.  When we are hurting, we need to ask God to use this for His glory and to help His other children.   Because He, “…who comforts us in all our affliction so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” (2 Corinthians 1:4)

In the real world of pain, how could one worship a God who was immune to it?  Because He laid aside His immunity to pain.  He entered our world of flesh and blood, tears and death.  He suffered for us.  Our sufferings become more manageable in the light of His.

Sadly, grief is part of the human experience.  Loss is part of life, and grief is a natural response to loss. But we have the hope of Christ, and we know that He is strong enough to carry our burdens.  We can find consolation in the Holy Spirit, our Comforter and Councillor. (See John 14:16)  

In grief, we cast our burdens on Him, rely on the community of the church, explore the truth of the Word, and ultimately experience hope. 

“And after you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you.” (1 Peter 5:10)

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