Living lives of Integrity

“Now this is our boast: Our conscience testifies that we have conducted ourselves in the world, and especially in our relations with you, in the holiness and sincerity that are from God. We have done so not according to worldly wisdom but according to God's grace.” (2 Corinthians 1:12)

Last week we talked about the concept of integrity.  What is it and why is it important.  Since then, I have had a request to discuss further about how we can walk in integrity.  So let’s begin by re-visiting the definition of this word. 

According to Dictionary.com integrity means: “adherence to moral and ethical principles; soundness of moral character; honesty.”

Integrity is not something that passes on from family to family like our DNA, it is something that is connected to our morals, character and the way that we see the world around us.  All my life, both my Grandparents and parents continually drummed into me the importance of a maintaining a good name; to be known for our integrity.

To develop Integrity one first has to desire it, and then one must practice it.  Think about it, if you who have never run a 5k marathon, and then all of a sudden you decide that you will try to run it.  You can be sure that your body will let you know that the idea is crazy. Integrity is a value that develops from the daily practice of doing the right things over and over again; until such a point that it becomes second nature.

So how does one walk in integrity?

Developing personal integrity requires examining your beliefs and value system, and taking conscious steps to behave in ways that are consistent with your personal moral code.  Many people have not thought through their personal value system.  They’re not sure who they are or what they stand for, and they wait until a crisis happens in their life to make their decision.  At that point, it’s too late. Faced then with great pressure, you will be more prone to take the route which is easier in that moment.  Decide now what you will and will not compromise on.  Then, when faced with ethical choices, the decision will have already been made.

There’s always a million reasons to compromise your integrity.  You hear them on the news every day as corporate bigwigs struggle to justify their fat bonus checks.  You can always come up with excuses that seem to make good sense and let you sleep better at night.  But at the end of the day, when you place your excuses on a scale next to integrity, you’ll realize you sold out something priceless for small change. There’s nothing more valuable than your good name and the ability to look at yourself in the mirror each day with a clear conscience.

When a great man falls from grace, we often wonder how he could have ever messed up so royally.  The truth is that he didn’t wake up one day and decide to do something stupid.  It started with a tiny bit of lying here and there.  From there he just kept on sliding down the slippery slope of compromise.  Don’t compromise on the little things, and you won’t on the bigger ones.

Justifying a means for a certain end is probably one of the most popular rationalizations there is for breaking with your integrity.  In reality, the journey toward an accomplishment or decision is just as important as the destination itself. Even if you are richly rewarded at the end, if you cannot look back on the means used to get there with anything but shame, your victory will be hollow indeed.

At the heart of integrity is the ability to own up to the fact that you are in control of your life.  You are responsible for both your successes and your failures. Nobody else, but you.

The first step towards integrity is being honest with yourself.  Be who you are.  Say what you mean.  Do what you say you will do.  Don’t just walk the walk; talk the talk.

*Here are some specific steps I think will help you get started:

Integrity at Work

1) Put in 40 Hours of Work for 40 Hours of Pay

You’re getting paid to do a job, not goof around. 

2) Don’t Steal

Yeah, the business you work for doesn’t pay you enough. And yeah, no one is going to miss that box of paperclips.  But it’s still stealing!

3) Be Transparent in Your Dealing with People

Say what you mean, and do what you say!

4) If Your Company or Friends try to Pressure You to Make Unethical Decisions, Walk Away

It’s not true every person has a price; a person of integrity prizes their character above monetary security.

5) Don’t Take Credit for Others’ Success

Never take someone’s idea and pitch it as your own.  And don’t jump on a wagon at the end of a successful ride that you didn’t contribute to.

Integrity in Relationships

1) Be an Open Book

Don’t keep secrets from your spouse or close friend.  Even if the secrets don’t affect them, if they find out you’ve been keeping stuff from them, it will erode trust between you.

2) Avoid Emotional Cheating

Having integrity in regards to physical cheating is a given.  Harder still is avoiding emotional cheating.  If you find yourself sharing more of your thoughts and feelings with a co-worker or friend than you do with your spouse, it’s time to take a big step back.

3) End a Relationship When You Know it’s over

If you’re dating someone and have reached the point where you know the two of you don’t have a future together, don’t keep dragging them along because you’re afraid to end things.  Break it up!

4) Keep Your Promises

Always, always follow-through with the things you said you will do.  A person’s word is their bond. If you tell your friends that you’ll hang out with them, and then that special someone you like invites you over–too bad.  You already made other plans.

5) Don’t Talk about Other People

Saying something behind someone’s back that you wouldn’t say to their face shows a distinct lack of integrity.

6) Be a Bank Vault

When friend trusts you with confidential information, lock those secrets away.  Nothing erodes a friendship faster than to break a trust in the secrets department.

7) And finally, pray!

Pray for the godly traits of honesty, sincerity and integrity. And that the Lord would help you maintain all that is good and righteous in your employment, relationships, and all aspects of your life, and not compromise the standard that He desires for you.

Walking in integrity is a very difficult choice.  We live in an imperfect world that seems to suggest that it’s foolish to be honest and righteous.  All around us we encounter people who actually appear to be rewarded for being dishonest.  This is a real challenge for the man or woman who decides to walk in integrity.

“Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but whoever takes crooked paths will be found out.” (Proverbs 10:9)

What does integrity mean to you? What are some other situations in which a man must show true integrity? Share your thoughts with everyone.

 

*Brett & Kate McKay, Living a Life of Integrity, April 7, 2009



Don't miss the Part 1: Walking with Integrity

 

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